Erotic Romance v. The Author - Renee Vickers
Hello folks! The indelible Margie Church has graciously offered me a bit of space on her blog today. So I guess I should start out by apologizing, sorry for dragging down your black market value Margie!
Most of you don’t know me, and for good reason, I’m one of the new kids on the writing block. Yep, I still have my new car smell; eh, you’ll have to take my word on that. Margie being the ever patient saint she is, knew the risks of agreeing to let me play with her pixels and still gave me the green light. *rubs hands together and laughs maniacally* Whatever’s about to happen I’ll take full responsibility. Have I apologized yet? Oh yes, I did, good! Let’s get to this then.
To say the least, I was thrilled, giddy and overwhelmed by this opportunity. But I knew conning her into letting me play here was only the first step; I had to sit down (calm down) and find something worthwhile to write. Can you imagine? Trying to find a topic to write about on a professional author’s blog that is both relevant to me, you - her readers and hasn’t been talked to death about? It wasn’t an easy feat. But I’m willing to give it an honest effort.
Saying that those who read erotic romance become so enthralled with the subject matter that they find their spouse less satisfying is a fairly sizable insult. What those making these blanket statements are saying is that Jane Doe was smart enough to marry John Doe (they weren’t related prior, I promise) but as their happy marriage wore on Jane was led astray by the big bad wolf who sucked her brain out with a straw. When she was returned to John, she realized she liked the wolf better. The truth of the matter is more likely Jane and John had children (let’s name them Jack and Jill), worked a full time job a piece, were stressed out by looming bills, mortgage payments, and obscene work deadlines and realized the love was no longer like it was. Rather than working together to fix the problems they had, John felt it was easier to blame the stack of saucy stories in Jane’s closet.
I like to think our readers are smarter than that. After all, they are reading this as we speak. *waves hello*
Enough of that. Blaming problems on an inanimate object is far too easy, but that’s not reality. Life is not easy. It’s painful, difficult, and I’m afraid answers are just not that simple. And our readers are not stupid. (Am I winning any brownie points yet?)
And with this horribly long lead in completed I’d like to address my point to all this blathering. I’m a relatively new comer to the erotic romance scene. Call me a late bloomer. So if anyone is susceptible for being led astray, it should be someone like me, little miss innocent (stop laughing). Right?! But rather than being brainwashed into thinking my husband is substandard and sending me swiftly on a pilgrimage for the aforementioned romance hunks, reading and writing in this genre has relaxed my social misconceptions of acceptable love, sex and foreplay. I’ve found myself more interested in exploring certain things with my husband. You could say it has expanded my perceptions a bit. Don’t ask I’m not going to hand out details, not in an open forum at least. My marriage and sex life have grown (please forgive the pun, thank you) since exploring the erotic romance genre. I would go as far as saying that because of my involvement in this genre I’m more comfortable expressing my wants and needs with my partner as well as being more receptive to his.
There’s no doubt this has affected my life positively, not only in the bedroom, but in my creative world as well. What started as a challenge by a friend, writing my first erotic romance short story has provided me with my first publication opportunity. Sly’s Surrender is a contemporary BDSM fiction set to be released through Noble Romance Publications on November 21st. It’s not even released yet but I’ve already made so many contacts with so many great writers in this genre its mind boggling. Being a writer by its nature alone is a reclusive occupation. Everything from the writing process to publication, marketing and promotions takes up so much of the author’s time that it’s easy for us to feel isolated and alone. But I’ve had exactly the opposite experience with my involvement in this genre. I’ve been put in touch and welcomed with open arms by so many incredibly talented, creative folks. It’s overwhelming.
If my experience has proven anything to me, it’s that the writers in the romance genre are far from the social degenerates naysayers would have you believe. They are certainly not conspiring to foil the sacred nature of marriage and healthy loving relationships.
Everyone is entitled to their own opinion of course, but before blanket statements are made (and accepted) saying that an entire genre is responsible for the downfall of the sanctity of marriage think about the implications. What’s not being communicated is that the genre is bad, but that the readers are accused of being too dim to discern fiction from reality.
Before I go, I want to share the blurb for Sly’s Surrender, my Naughty Nibble book coming out November 21, from Noble Romance. I hope you'll watch for it!
Sly's Surrender, by R. Renee Vickers
By day Sly is a take-charge, no-nonsense restaurateur, and at night she plays her hand as a demanding mistress. Sly has everything her heart desires: a successful business with loyal patrons, a gorgeous boyfriend and a flare for dominating in the bedroom. Everything she’s ever tried has gone her way, every decision followed to success, every goal achieved, and yet she yearns for more.
One night she decides to try something new, giving up her customary control to the tall, dark, and sexy Jake. Jake is put in a position to prove to his lover just what he’s capable of, and Sly experiences the new pleasures to be found in letting someone else handle her reins.
Renee, thanks for being my guest today. I appreciate your perspectives on this issue. It's certainly something most of us have faced when we meet people who ridicule the genre. And thank you also, for elevating my ego to monstrous proportions. Best wishes with Sly's Surrender. I'll be cheering you on. Come back when it's out and blog with me again.
Margie
Categories: give aways, blog contests, guest bloggers, Noble Romance, education, erotica blogs, margie church, contests
Tags: Renee Vickers guest bloggers Noble Romance Margie Church Margie erotica
Loved the topic Renee and welcome to the writing world.
Hi Margie...*waves*
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Dawn, it's always a pleasure to have you come by. And yes, Renee's book does sound terrific.
Margie
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Just so I don't clog up Margie's in-box:
@Dawn, Thanks so much! I appreciate you stopping by and your warm welcome!
@Margie, I know, I know *blushes* but I'm new and have license to gush. Hugs!
@Star, I appreciate your feedback! I hope you enjoy my story when it comes out! Thanks for stopping in!
@KevaD I think you're onto something there! The Margie being to blame if nothing else! Thanks so much for stopping in and for your support.
@Judy, Right! I think she was a marriage therapist to boot. I would have fired her for that if I was paying her. Obviously clueless! But it's folks like that that keeps it interesting, and it's given us one more jump off point for the conversation to stay relevant. Thank you for swinging by and dropping in!
@Doris Research is great!! 9 chillins, good gravy woman!!! That's a lot of studying *cough*. Ha! Thanks so much for your support!
@Rosalie Thanks again! That's some high praise that I hope I can live up to *gets on big girl pants* I'll do my best!
@desiree Thanks so much for coming by! I appreciate your feedback and support.
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Many, many thanks Margie! I can't say it enough! You're a wonderful hostess!
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Renee, you're going to give me a big head. Please. I'm just an ordinary person. Enjoy your day here.
Hugs,
Margie
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Hi Renee~
What a great article! Thank you for sharing your insights and I have to say I agree with your comments about romance/erotica broadening our horizons and opening up paths of communication that we might not have otherwise!
I can’t wait to read Sly’s Surrender, it sounds like it will be an interesting story!
Star
stardf@gmail.com
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The trend anymore is to blame everything but the person responsible. Somewhere along the line it just seems accountablility fell off a lot of people's shoulders.
"I wouldn't be in jail if the cops hadn't arrested me."
"My kid wouldn't have flunked math if the school didn't require him to know how to count."
"I wouldn't have hit him if his face hadn't been where my fist went."
"I wouldn't have cheated on my spouse if that book hadn't been so damn good."
"I wouldn't be posting this comment if Margie Church hadn't created this blog."
Wait a minute. That one has some validity.
Nice post. Wishing you much success with your book, Renee.
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Well said, Renee!
I almost spewed my coffee the day I read that last article about how erotic romance ruins the sex life of married women. Yeah, right. You've laid out the truth very eloquent! Thank you, my dear, and keep writing those hot erotic romances!!
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Hi Renee,
*waves*
I remember that article you're referring to and both hubbie and I were laughing about it, lol. I'm a newcomer on the writing block too and my experiences completely mirror yours. I've always been an avid romance reader, but only discovered Erotic Romance over the last year and I haven't looked back, heck I even write it now
Far from being damaging to our relationship it has enhanced it. We have baby number nine to prove the point. I firmly blame 'research' for our eleven week old bundle of fun... *cough*
Incidentally hubbie and I have been married for twenty two years! Long live romance
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Absolutely wonderful piece -- and so well-written, too! (not a real shocker, granted, but still, I had to dish out some praise). I've had this discussion before -- on different forums where people may or may not have accused me of being a part of the "destroy the American family" campaign.
Romance novels and stories -- erotic or not -- are just about as culpable for destroying a marriage as Hannibal Lecter is for the rise in cannibalism. Blaming fiction for the state of reality shows a deep denial and a desire to avoid taking that long overdue look in the mirror. Otherwise, my mom lied to me and that letter from Hogwarts is WAAAY overdue. ;o)
Absolutely fantastic piece. Thanks for sharing!
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well your live can change but what you need to do is ask him or her if they
give you insights on the book you want to wrtite
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Renee, I think I'm a little in love with you. *winks* Ya know, in the fellow authorly friendly way.
I think that erotic romance novels are one among a whole host of things certain people like to blame for ruining the sanctity of marraige. If it weren't so sad, it would be hilarious, really.
I can't wait to read your kinky tale! I need to get more reading material. ^_^ Great post, and I look forward to seeing more from you!
Blessings,
Dena
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LMAO Dena! *wink*
Right! Seems like some people just don't get it. Really, thanks for all of the kind words!
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Awesome post, Renee! I don't even write erotic romance and I still have people looking down their noses as me, so I went to plan B. Now I just say "I work in the porn industry" when someone asks what I do. If the conversation goes any further, the news that I'm an author of romance novels usually comes as a great relief (or a bit of a let down) to the other party. And my husband has NOTHING to complain about! (Uh, except maybe when I tell people I work in the porn industry.)
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You say you work in the porn industry? Hummmm.
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LMAO. Only to a select few, Margie. You'd have to meet them to appreciate them (or, rather, to appreciate not having met them before, lol.)
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Well, if we had a pint of Jameson, I'd tell you about some of the people I've stared down on this subject. My usual response is that you'd better watch your back and your wife, because I'm going to kidnap her and do unspeakable things to her. I'll be shooting you in the forehead and burying you with a backhoe..and laughing. Oh, and embezzle from you and become a drug addict and in my spare time, I'll probably have sex in public places. Did I mention I lector in church? Because I do.
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LOL Margie! I bet they don't have much to say after that!
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I worked with a woman who used to say things like, why is it all about the sex? It's a ROMANCE. we have sex in romances. The only people who are hung up on this stuff are the ones who don't have sex.
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Ha! Thanks Sarah! Holy crap I'd give one of the southern baptists around here a heart attack if I did that!. *takes notes*
:-* Thanks for stopping by!
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Thank you for such an insightful article on Erotic Romance novels. It told me a few things I did not know.
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Thanks for visiting, Julie. I hope you'll become a regular.
Margie
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Thanks so much Julie! I appreciate you coming by!
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Great post, Renee
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Thank you so much Ursula!
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Brilliant, Renee. Loved it. A pleasure to read your words.
Btw, I'm the social degenerate. Just sayin....
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LOL! Thanks so much K.B.!
I'll show you my social degenerate, if you show me yours!
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Great post. Look forward to reading more about Sly and Jake, sounds hot!
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Thanks so much Ellie! I really appreciate you stopping by.
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Great piece, Renee!
I look forward to reading your new release when it's out. Best of luck with it, and you're welcome on my sites any time!
Lucy x
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Thank you for coming by Lucy! I appreciate the invite (and totally intend to take you up on it!) Thanks!!
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Hi Renee,
Great article!
Its so sad that so many narrow-minded people need to spew their ignorance about our genre and yes, I said our genre. We can rightfully and proudly claim it because we support it and all of the sub-genres revolving around Romance.
Good for you on getting published and I can wait to see what you come up with next
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Thank you Ren! I really appreciate your support and feedback!
Ah, yes my future pieces *bites nails nervously* yeah, uh, something will come up!
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As a thank you for stopping by I have a $5 Noble Romance to raffle off!
....Drum Roll.....
.......and the winner is.....
Rosalie Stanton!
Congratulations!
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Loved this piece, Renee! And belated welcome to the Noble family. I'm playing hide and seek with you all from my writing cave.
I so totally get what you said here. In fact, let me share something. I was reading this romance where the hero had ridiculously wide and amazing shoulders, and it so happened I was pissed with my husband at the time. Then, up I look from my screen, to find my husband standing near the door, his back to me, and I realised... damn he had a ridiculously amazing set of shoulders, and silly girl that I am, I'd forgotten that'e exactly what got me to notice him in a gathering of 100+ people.
Romance and erotic romance feeds our real life love stories - not the other way round!
Congrats on your upcoming release - bet you're totally excited! XOXO
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that's not silly at all Zee!
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Thanks for the kind words and warm welcome Zee!!
And your hubs must have some great shoulders to stand out like that! Wowzers! Viva la Romance!
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